The Ladykillers (2004)

This is the Coen brothers trying too hard: a great cast has been overwrought in this witless farce of crude jokes, bad accents and stereotypes. 

See the 1955 original starring Sir Alec Guiness and Peter Sellers if you prefer your comedy quirky, but smart.

Black Swan (2010)

Black Swan is a terrifying descent into madness from director Darren Aronofsky. Moody and atmospheric, the film takes the viewer on a delusional trip where you are never really sure who or which of your senses to trust. Every element of this film works beautifully to create mirage of fear and passion.

Smart casting takes the film to another level. Natalie Portman is exquisite at the fragile dancer Sayers. The evolution from virginal ballerina to hardened prima donna is brilliant. Portman plays her masterfully. Her character is so multi-faceted, so physically and emotionally obsessed. Portman deserves an Oscar. As her obsession grows, the viewer is equally repulsed and intrigued. Barbara Hershey as Sayers mom is unsettling in every sense of the word—another beautiful turn. Mila Kunis role as new rival ballerina Lily is parlayed into a thrilling paradox. Vincent Cassel is the company director whose brilliance is only outshined by his lust for his dancers.

There is an unsettling intensity herein thanks to Aronofsky. His direction is calculated for optimum effect. His ability to capture the erosion of the psyche is amazing. Every frame is calculated for optimum effect. The film oozes with an eerie and unsettling fragility that no words can do justice. The score is vibrates your soul.  In retrospect, this film could have been silent in nature and just as effective.

As I see it, one word can describe Black Swan. Intensity—of which you have never experienced. Black Swan is difficult to watch, but even more difficult to turn away from.

As You Like It (2006)

An overwrought adaptation of Shakespeare’s tale of love and mistaken identity from director Kenneth Branagh set in feudal Japan with a bunch of British people.  Not his best work.

Feast of Love (2007)

Incredibly irritating romantic dramedy with a nice ensemble cast with Morgan Freeman and his ‘God’ personality.

Man on the Moon (2000)

Jim Carrey stars as Andy Kaufman in the biopic that I found obnoxious—not because Carrey is awful. I just have no appreciation for the source material.

The Stepford Wives (1975) (2004)

The original film starring Katherine Ross as Joanna Eberhart is a complete atmospheric creep-out. Joanna and her husband Walter (Peter Masterson) leave the hustle and bustle of NYC for the peace and quiet of Stepford, Connecticut. Soon after arriving to Stepford, Joanna notices not only a change in her husband, but odd behaviour from its residents. The tension builds as Joanna and her new friend Bobbie (Paula Prentiss) dig deeper into the lives of the neighborhood ladies who seem content with household chores. As the truth is revealed, the viewer alongside Joanna is dying to escape the horror.

In stark contrast is the 2004 remake starring Nicole Kidman and Matthew Broderick. Kidman is pitch perfect as a Stepford wife. Glen Close is equally cold and vacant. But sadly the remake misses its mark. Somewhere between cleverly campy and thrillingly creepy is this waste of time.

As I see it, the original is well-executed psychological thriller. It’s remake is mess-terpiece.

House of Wax (2005)

I'm not a huge fan of the hack 'n' slash genre of horror.  I prefer a finer more nuanced movie; then again, a good scare is aways fun.

There is absolutely NO resemblance to the eerie 1953 classic except the name. The newest iteration dumps the old plot and characters in favor of a gory romp starring hot (DUH!), ill-fated teen who take a shortcut to a football game and due to some incredibly stupid decisions end up in the company of some overly life-like wax sculptures.

House of Wax is a movie about twins. Good ones. Bad ones. Normal, well-adjusted ones. Abnormal, mal-adjusted ones. Carly (Elisha Cuthbert) and Nick (Chad Michael Murray) are the good ones trying to outwit and survive the freakshow that is Bo and Vincent (Brian Van Holt). Meanwhile all the friends played by Paris Hilton, Jared Padalecki, Jon Abrahams, and Robert Richard meet their maker at the hand of a twin.

Speaking of gruesome, each of these murders are disgusting and quite frankly, disturbing. It's all compounded by the casual nature in which these acts are committed. As with most slasher movies, this film lies on the shallow side of things. Don't go for plot depth or character development. Keep it all in perspective and go. Go for the superglued lips. Go for the finger nipped by wire cutters. Go for the dead animal carcasses. Go for the hot wax sprayed on a still alive person. Go for a pole through the head. Go for the decapitation. Go for the scissors, er... go for the sheer diabolical killing scenes.

House of 9 (2005)

This low-budget and ultimately forgettable imitation of Saw stars Dennis Hopper as a Catholic priest.

Old School (2003)

I'm wishing for 90 minutes of my life back right now.

Guilty Pleasure: Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy (2004)

Anchorman is a delicious farce of a male-dominated era that I have no excuse for enjoying, but I do. To my embarrassment, Anchorman quotes find their way into my daily life. How does such a retarded film bring me such joy? It's the flute.

Will Ferrell goes for the gusto as big-shot news anchor Ron Burgundy. The insulting verbal sparring between Burgundy and aspiring lead anchorwoman Veronica Corningstone (Christina Applegate) kills. So does rock flute, loud noises and Sex Panther cologne. Ferrell's antics as Burgundy are supported by skirt-chasing adulators played by Steve Carell, Paul Rudd, and the often misaligned David Koechner. A must see is the cameo-filled gang fight with Tim Robbins as public television anchor, Ben Stiller as the Spanish channel anchor, and Luke Wilson.

The comedy is obvious—often obnoxious—but it's just so gloriously cheesy. Carrell’s dumb as a rock weatherman is priceless, but Paul Rudd’s ‘musking up’ is hysterical. You get everything in this production: side-splitting dialogue, slapstick humor, sight gags, and offensive sexist comments.

As I see it, Anchorman is a totally guilty pleasure. It’s so dumb. And I like it.

Rushmore (1998) // The Royal Tenenbaums (2001)

Wes Anderson is easily one of my favorite directors.  His unexpected views are always a delight.  Each of his films are a personal favorite.  Here are only two. 

Rushmore (1998)
Max Fischer (Jason Schwartzmann) is a sophomore at Rushmore Academy. Preferring to engage in extracurricular activities, Max finds himself on academic probation. Rushmore is threatening to fail him. Max befriends the father of his fellow students, Herman Blume (Bill Murray) and an odd relationship begins. Being expelled from Rushmore doesn’t keep Max from falling in love with his former teacher, Ms. Cross (Olivia Williams). It’s unfortunate, because Herman does too.

The understated performances make this movie. Schwartzmann and Murray play against each other wonderfully. They are essentially the same character at a different stage in life. Max is a naïve, overachieving and often pompous young man while Herman is a wealthy pompous old fart—both are looking for validation and their place in the world. Engaged in tug-of-war for the same woman’s heart, Schwartzmann and Murray’s roles are simultaneously odd, fun, and delightfully nuanced.

Writer/director Wes Anderson has created a beautiful film with understanding and sympathy for the adolescent—albeit characterized—experience. Every element of the film falls into place creating an intricate weave of cinematography, dialogue, settings, and score. It’s quite an experience.

This was the second of Anderson’s films for me. I watched Rushmore only after falling in love with The Royal Tenenbaums.  The Tenenbaums were most first exposure to Wes.  For that reason, this film is my favorite.

***

The Royal Tenenbaums (2001)

The Tenenbaums are unlike any family you’ll ever know and this is their dysfunctional story.

Alec Baldwin narrates the story of Royal Tenenbaum (Gene Hackman). Royal and his wife Etheline (Angelica Huston) have three children: Chas, Ritchie, and Margot. Royal's lack of interest in his children is the cause of his separation from Ethel. He leaves; as the years pass the children have become prodigies under their mother’s guidance.

Many years later and after hearing the Tenenbaum accountant is moving in on his wife, Royal feigns terminal cancer in effort to regain all that he has lost.

The diagnosis of cancer helps bring the errant former prodigies home. Chas (Ben Stiller) started buying real estate in his early teens and had a preternatural understanding of international finance. Now, a widower, he is struggling to come to grips with the loss of his wife in a tragic plane crash. Chas has become a safety freak and returns to the Tenenbaum family with his two boys in tow after deciding their apartment needs additional sprinklers and security. Ritchie (Luke Wilson) was a tennis phenom at an early age. After losing a game, Ritchie inexplicably leaves the game. He spends his days on a boat wandering on the high seas (for no apparent reason) until the news reaches him. Margot—she’s adopted—was a brilliant playwright and a smoker at twelve. She returns to the family home upon hearing of Ritchie’s arrival.

Oh… it gets better my dear friends. The colorful supporting cast includes Owen Wilson, Danny Glover, and Anderson muse, Bill Murray in memorable roles.

The Royal Tenenbaums is extremely well played. Writer/director Wes Anderson’s screenplay is top-notch—subtly outrageous and quirky. Physical comedy, agile dialogue, and brilliant chemistry are just the beginning. Add an unusually eye-catching production including oddly framed chapter introductions and assaulting opening credits, and plotlines advancing to the tunes of The Beatles, Bob Dylan, The Clash, The Velvet Underground, and The Rolling Stone… well, we got emotional resonance, too.

As I see it, Anderson essentially let’s Hackman and his cohorts run (cleverly) amok. But amid all the seeming chaos is the realization that family—no matter the dysfunction—is what life is all about.

The Visitor (2007)

Professor Walter Vale (Richard Jenkins) has been on autopilot since his wife’s death. Walter exists; but nothing more. Returning to his New York apartment after an extended absence, he is surprised to find an immigrant couple squatting in his home. Tarek and Zainab interest him. Whether out of pity or boredom, Walter allows the couple to stay while he attends his required convention. Walter forges an unlikely friendship with Tarek, enchanted by his passion for life. But when Tarek is profiled and thrown into a detention center, Walter finds a passion unlike no other.

The Visitor is an unassuming independent film that you will either love or hate. Braving a very polarizing topic—illegal immigration—director Thomas McCarthy examines the relationship of Walter and Tarek without taking sides. Bravo McCarthy for achieving so much depth and emotion from the screenplay in 98 minutes.  The film takes sides, but Walter is there as the devil's advocate.

Richard Jenkins is phenomenal. His Walter Vale is an overwhelmingly sad man, but subtly so. He finds joy in nothing until Tarek and his African drum enter his life. Walter's evolution is beautiful thanks to this performance.

The bittersweet inevitability of The Visitor is the film’s crux. The viewer expects it, but any other resolution would cheapen the experience. As I see it, The Visitor is a quiet film that will ultimately call the viewer’s feeling will be called into question. Your response to that will determine the success of this film.

British Favourites: Death at a Funeral (2007)

Death at a Funeral is a delightfully odd-ball black comedy.  Very much in the vein of their forefathers (Monty Python, anyone?), nothing is off-limits here.  In the wake of an American remake that is nothing but a horrible comedy with black people, I feel compelled.

The British do it better.

 Fans of dark British humor and odd comedy will enjoy this rather peculiar movie. David (Matthew Macfayden) is nervous about his father's funeral wake. He is delivering the eulogy even though his brother, Robert (Rupert Graves) is a famous writer. But when a strange midget (Peter Dinklage) appears and threatens to expose the recently deceased patriarch's extramarital gay affairs lest David and Robert pay him off, the brothers take matters in their own hands.

Frank Oz directs this madcap piece filled with a virtual no-name {to me anyways} and mostly British cast. Led by Macfayden {Pride & Prejudice} like you've never seen, Death at a Funeral is an insane romp. The far-fetched plot is a perfect medium for some great individual performances. Alan Tudyk (A Knight's Tale, 3:10 to Yuma, Dodgeball) as the boyfriend who is unknowingly macked-out on acid, gets a perfect opportunity to shine and steals the show. Macfayden is a straight-laced foil to his co-stars. Graves, Dinklage, Kris Marshall, Andy Nyman, Daisy Donovan, and Jane Asher {Paul McCartney's one-time girl friend} all have moments that induce side-splitting laughter.

Family relations are always complex. Sibling rivalry is just the beginning in this British farce where family turmoil ultimately threatens to overshadow the funeral. Despite it all, a heartfelt eulogy is delivered.

Death at a Funeral is NOT for everyone. If you like your humor quick, dry, un-PC, and British, then this is for you. From the moment the wrong body is delivered to the front door, Death at a Funeral is a spot-on comedy.

Mean Girls (2004)

After watching this vapid and overly-inflated story, I am left with two questions: 1) What the heck happened to Lindsay Lohan?! It’s a shame such potential is being squandered. 2) Who’s responsible for Rachel McAdams’ bad dye job? Seriously.

As I see it, there are better movies with the same message (and more inspired casting) out there.

Fever Pitch (2005)

Surprisingly sweet romantic comedy (based on the book by Nick Hornby) about Ben (Jimmy Fallon) a crazed Boston Red Sox fan and his workaholic girlfriend Lindsey (Drew Barrymore) who must overcome their respective obsessions that threaten to destroy their relationship. 

Kenny (2006)

“I don't know what all the fuss is about, it's 80% water and we've got chemicals to take care of the remaining 20” and with that Aussie Kenny Smyth (Shane Jacobson) begins a look into his world. Kenny—imagine an obese John Travolta with a lisp—takes care of business, the port-a-john kind, with an uncommon blend of heart and humor. No matter the size of the event, Kenny has the right facilities for you.

Kenny is a hilarious mockumentary that with surprising heart and a very likable star. Filled with underplayed toilet humor and filmed on location at actual events, i.e. the International Cleaners and Pumpers Convention in Nashville, Tennessee gives the film an uncanny realism. Actor Shane Jacobson owns his role with amazing authenticity and everyday humbleness.

When Kenny isn’t dealing with a ring lost down the crapper or his co-workers, he’s suffering with an ex-wife that despises him, a young son, his father who can’t cope that his son Kenny ‘delivers toilets’ and his high-class brother. Kenny soldiers on with dignity and grace; he’s a likable fellow and his life is an admirable one. He just happens to clean toilets.

As I see it, Kenny is a smart character dramedy that isn’t about crap so much as the man who must deal with it.

Special (2006)

Les Franken (Michael Rapaport) is a local meter maid who is approved to take part in clinical trials of a new antidepressant. Adverse side effects leave Les convinced that he is developing super powers. Despite his doctor’s behest that Les quit taking the medicine, Les dons superhero threads to fight the evil that maligns the world with very mixed results.

Special is an original idea lacking focus; at only 80 minutes the film is over before you really mind. Part black comedy, part social satire and kind of enjoyable Special is held together by Rapaport’s admirable performance. His portrayal of a mediocre man draws respectable sympathy from the viewer. But his drop off the deep end is befuddling. The oddball-supporting cast offers a few laughs, but in this sad tale everything seems out of place including them.

As I see it, Special isn’t worth your time unless you’re a fan of Rapaport. It’s a solidly mediocre film.

Chapter 27 (2007)

Even the most ardent of Lennon devotees shouldn’t bother with Chapter 27 starring an overweight Jared Leto as schizophrenic Mark David Chapman. The film focuses on the days leading up to the murder of Lennon and Chapman’s journey from weirdo to channeling Holden Caulfield. Heavy on voiceover—representative of spiraling insanity —and Catcher in the Rye references, the most fascinating bit of the film is the guy who plays Lennon. Onscreen for merely a few seconds, Mark Lindsay Chapman {yep} looks legit as the Beatle.

As I see it, Chapter 27 is a lonely drag that rewards the long-suffering viewer with pain and sadness. You know how the story ends. Avoid this bore.

Noise (2007)

New Yorker David Owen (Tim Robbins) is a fussy old man. Desperate for peace and quiet, he turns his hatred for car alarms and their never-ending shill inward and becomes ‘The Rectifier’. Breaking into the offending cars to pop the hood and deactivate their alarms draws the attention of the mayor (William Hurt) who is determined to end this vigilante justice.

Noise is an insipid disjoined mess. That’s a shame considering the originality of the plot. The issues are threefold. The cast is content to phone-in uninspired performances. Tim Robbins with his lethargic whiny delivery comes across all wrong. He’s the neighbor everyone loves to hate. Delightful Bridget Moynahan is miscast as an uninteresting, disinterested wife. And the superb William Hurt is a total douche. It also lacks focus with a narrative that falters long before it gets started. Combined with all that is a thinly veiled socio-satirical diatribe and you’ve got a mess-terpiece.

Watching the Detectives (2007)

Vapid comedy with a psuedo warning for movie nerds.  (Live life, don't watch it.) Too bad Lucy Luo stars thereby negating any redeeming qualities.